Monday, April 13, 2015

Random Sandwich

I am working on the Scrappy Mountain Majesties quilt, and it is coming together nicely on the design wall.  I have two more rows to add, plus borders.

Fellow quilter Marei is making one too.  It was her idea, in fact, that we pick a free Bonnie Hunter pattern that neither of us had made yet and make it simultaneously.  I happened to have a few on my bucket list and thought it was a great idea!  Marei doesn't have a blog, but perhaps she will upload some progress pics to her Flickr page at some point (hint-hint). I have seen a sneak peak of her blocks and they are awesome!

These blocks are so fun and quick to make.  I am using all stash and scraps for this quilt.  Some of the light fabrics I'd pulled turned out to be a little too busy, though, so I've had to cull a few and get creative with the remainder, including:
  • a vintage cotton curtain found at a flea market a couple years ago
  • a feed sack fabric, still in the shape of a sack until I cut it apart for this project
  • two thrifted men's shirts
  • a quilting cotton that was a little too yellowish-brown a print on its right side, so I flipped it wrong side out.
She's Back
Mama Mallard has come back this year to nest in the same place in the hosta bed on the north side of the house. She's made herself comfortable among last year's leaves.

Doesn't she look all cosy and camouflaged?  She is very unflappable, that girl.  I did rake the bed out around her this weekend and she didn't budge, just kept a beady eye on me.  I talked to her in soft tones as I raked, not that she really cared.

She's kind of gimpy this year.  I think whatever attacked her eggs last year may have gotten her as well.  She was seen limping around the yard with the drake on her heels before she got on the nest and parked it.  Once the hen starts sitting, she shoos the drake away.  He flies off elsewhere to strut, preen, drink his fill of pond scum, and chase more tail.  At least that's my assumption.  What happens in Duck Vegas stays in Duck Vegas.

Conspiracy Theory
Three strikes and I'm out of underwear.  Let me explain.

I needed new undies, so I headed to Kohl's to buy the brand/style I like.  Wouldn't you know, they didn't have the same ones anymore.  So I bought something similar, same size.  Let's call that size X, where X represents a digit I will not disclose.  Sure, I'll talk publicly about my underwear, but the numeric value assigned to said underwear shall not be named.  Boundaries, y'all.

I have worn X for years.  I've worn X when I weighed less and I've worn X when I weighed more.  X was/is my size.  Theoretically.

When I got home with X size undies, I tried them on, as you do.  They were too tight.  Okay, maybe this style ran smaller.  Strike one.

Went to Penney's and bought a Warner's brand, very comfy looking, similar style, seemingly all the right ingredients to a good pair of knickers.  Make that three pair, because there was a buy two get one free deal.  Swiped my card, took them home, tried them on.  Strike two.

A couple weeks pass, allowing time for my frustration level to decrease, and this time I'm at Walmart looking at the display of drawers.  So pretty.  So inexpensive, comparatively speaking.  And what's this?  "The Best Fitting Panty in the World."  Size X.  Sold!

You guessed it:  Strike three.

I am convinced the Universe has conspired to have me face facts:  Thy bum is bigger.  No longer X but [insert audible gasp] Y, where Y is that size that careens dangerously down the granny panty aisle.

Darn you, Universe.  I bet you go commando.

12 comments:

Marei said...

OK...I am truly laughing out loud! Granny panty? commando? I vote commando!! You know I'm loving your blocks. I got a couple more done yesterday but have a way to go until I can actually look at them in a design fashion.

Terri said...

You would think that they would have a standard in sizes. And the styles change too. Why? Do they think I'll never need new ones? Some of mine are probably 20 years old - so I bought some new ones... they looked like the ones I like, but NO. The new ones have a very open leg. I hate the feeling. They are delegated to be night timers. I understand your frustration.
On the bright side, you are making one beautiful quilt. I would love to see your friend's quilt, too.
Hugs

Hazel said...

I am laughingly suggesting that you add a bit of quilting fabric to each side of those undies that are too small...since you are a quilter, you know!

Lara B. said...

Okay, I can type now that my sides are done hurting from laughing so hard.
Paulette, i am glad that your boundaries are as stretchy as your knickers.
Hmmmm...Hazel's idea has promise.
What a wonderful idea you and Marei had to do a Bonnie Hunter Not So Mysterious Quilt!
Loving your Scrappy Mountain Majesties!

QuiltSwissy said...

OMG! You are me! Increased size and all. I started my diet today.

And Failed! Went to Golden Corral for supper! LOL

audrey said...

Too, too funny. I don't dare go shopping for underwear now!

Kaja said...

Thanks for raising a big smile, and for sharing your underwear issues. The universe can be less than tactful about these things. Your blocks are looking really good - you have a great eye for colour.

patty a. said...

The quilt is wonderful!!! I love zig zag style quilts. The way you varied the colors in each row just makes the piece sparkle! I feel you pain about the undies! There is a brand I love and I just go to ebay and buy them there. Yes, that sounds a bit crazy, but once I bought a bathtub on ebay so underwear doesn't seem that crazy - well, at least to me!

Kevin the Quilter said...

First things first.....Scrappy Mountains Majesties is now on my list thanks to you! I LOVE your colors and layout! Your bit on Mama Mallard was great....I hope this year's flock makes it through! Finally, your panty eXpose' sent me to the emergency room.....not really.....but, I think I better ice my knees from flying over backwards in the computer chair and crushing them in the desk! I NEVER know what I am going to read when visiting your blog! Perhaps you could just go commando as the commercial suggests by using those Cottonelle wipes????

lvkwilt said...

I seem to have the same problem...I can't believe how hard it is to find comfortable underwear! Good luck with your quest!

Alycia said...

I am totally with you on the conspiricy!!! But I love your Smoky Mountain quilt!!

Marie said...

I HATE shopping for undies, for all of the reasons you describe. Commando. Now there's an option...

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